when you tell your friends a joke and no one laughs
man every time i rewatch captain america i’m like. so inspired by dr. erskine. what a dude. bleeding out in steve rogers’ arms and his final act before dying is to go in for a last second boob touch. like, the dude saw his window of opportunity closing and he snatched it. not gonna see pecs like those in a shirt that tight in the afterlife. gotta make every minute on earth count.
"kids arent being social now a days because of those brain washing phones" what the fuck do you think we’re doing with the phones. do you think we just stare at the number pad. do you think twitter is just a one way text from a robot bird.
ok but literally how
Was anyone else a little bit disappointed that the kick ass Lady Counsel Member turned out to be Natasha? Still love Natasha, but for a few glorious seconds, it was awesome to see an older woman come out of nowhere to kick ass.
who wore it best?
don’t trust anybody who compliments your smile. they just get off on seeing the little bits of skeleton poking out through your gums. anybody who tells you you’ve got a nice smile is a certified skeleton fucker.
i turn legal in ten days