monobeartheater:

verylittlebird:

a magician asks you to pick a card - any card, in fact. you do. they ask you to put the card back in the pack - anywhere in the pack, in fact. you do. they walk away. ten years later, your wife gives birth to the six of clubs. “is this your card?” the midwife asks, in a familiar voice.

what the fuck

brujita95:

sometimes i remember that like white people dont eat rice that often like sometimes they have meals that are just meat and vegetables and its like??? wheres the rice??? what are you doing??? your plate isnt complete??? 

perrsiia:

headcanon that when makoto’s parents get fed up w how many cats mako has in his room, he’s too soft hearted to just release them into the streets so he just puts them into haru’s house and haru doesnt know where all the cats keep coming from

he’s like, ‘maybe there’s too much mackerel here’

'does my house smell like fish' 

'whats going on'

Probably the most famous of all magical beasts, dragons are among the most difficult to hide. The female is generally larger and more aggressive than the male, though neither should be approached by any but highly skilled and trained wizards. Dragon hide, blood, heart, liver, and horn have highly magical properties, but dragon eggs are defined as Class A Non-Tradeable Goods. There are ten breeds of dragon, though these have been known to interbreed on occasion, producing rare hybrids. Pure-bred dragons are as follows… 

does anyone know the song that’s playing when johnny and carlito are in the club, around 31:10, right before they fight in the storage room?

boiledleather:

not even the Red God can save you from sick burns

theredberet:

*slides a ten dollar bill to the bbc* there’s two more of those if you start up merlin again

three more of those if you set it in the modern era, with arthur being completely unable to do the most basic things, such as: flipping a light switch. working a microwave. using zippers.